Ok guys i need to get something off my chest. My mother in law is pissing me off like BIG TIME
I used to have a pretty good relationship with her but things started when i was pregnant with my daughter. She said she wanted it to be a daughter because she loves to buy pink stuff. I was teasing her and said that i didnt want her to dress in pink because i dont like pink. She just said she didnt care and would dress her in pink anyway as if my opinion didnt count.
Then - this is to me the worse thing she said to me and i cant forgive her for it - when i was in hospital, the day after my daughter was born she came to visit us for the first time and said: 'oh but believe me, being a grandmother is must more special then becoming a mother. Grandmothers are the most important person in a child's life'
Uhmmm
Are you insane? That's why a child probably has 2 grandmothers and only 1 mother
anyway, things started since then. I breastfed my little girl but my mother in law didnt approve because i would have a much stronger band with my daughter than she could have. She also said breastmilk isnt good for the baby
She also buys lots of clothes for my daughter. So much that i cant buy something myself. I mean, it would be silly to go buy clothes when you have them but i cant buy something
I like. Same goes for toys and more of that crap.
We have sold our house a few months ago in order to build a new one. First we thought about moving a little closer to them but we are soooooo past that and are looking for a piece of land to build on in the area we live now. We are like 50 km apart from each other, which is a lot here in Belgium. But they disapprove and kind of demand that we move closer. Thank God my husband supports me in all my problems with her and said that he'll move even further away if they dont stop whining.
But there are so many things like that. Little remarks, comments,... She means 'well' but she makes me feel like a bad mother and therefor she is wrong imo. Every time i tell my daughter 'no, you ant have that' or 'no, you cant do that' she picks her up and lets her do it anyway for a minute and then she says: 'oh no dear, your mom said no' or 'Your mom doesnt let you have that' ...
She also wants to take care of my daughter during the day but luckily i was able to say no to that so my daughter can go to daycare. I think that's important for her social skills and so on.
Anyway a few months ago i had asked her to babysit for a couple of hours as my husband and i had to go somewhere. A few weeks after that we had to go to a wedding reception and i had asked my mother to babysit. OMG that was horrible. My mother in law started crying to my father in law that she wasnt good enough to babysit and that she wasnt allowed to see my daughter and stuff like that
I was like WTF???? Cant my mother babysit for once?? Is she not good enough?? Get a f*cking life b!tch
Every time my husband and i go somewhere with our daughter she wants to be there as well. We visited a open-air museum, just the 3 of us as a family ... she was upset that we didnt ask her to come along. Every single weekend she needs to visit my daughter. She has no respect for us as a family: my husband, my daughter and me (and the 2nd baby on the way) she wants to be there in everything we do.
God, it really pisses me off. I must say that i am thankful my husband supports me. He gets pissed of with his mom even more than me. Sadly for her, he doesnt shut up while i try to be diplomatic and not tell her straight to her face what i think of her.
Also thank god that my father in law is a decent and intelligent man. He gets pissed off at her as well from time to time. He told me once that she drives him insane with her obsessive behaviour. When we go on vacation we have to send a test msg every single day to inform her what we have done that day, the wheather, how our daughter is doing,... We ignore her messages tho
but it is still annoying. LEAVE US ALONE!! Let us have some time as a family!!
Am i being irrational? Is that too much to ask? Am i the nut here?
I should have posted this in the vent your frustrations forum