[LizardKing{TSU}]

lol ya.. Chuck can't read very well, and I thought his "favorite" one of 'em was lame.. there are some that are waaay better than that. I hope he wasn't serious when He said those guys should be screen writers

and if you're bringing out the GrendelNorris jokes, I'm bring out the Mr.T{tsu} jokes


Mr. T{tsu} invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.



In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government they survived ad soldiers of fortune, until Mr. T{tsu} found them and beat them to death with his bare hands.



Mr. T{tsu} once pitied the sun. An ice age followed.


Mr. T{tsu} speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.



Why does Mr. T{tsu} still have his mohawk? Cause his reflection pities the fool who don't!


23. That's the number of people Mr. T{tsu} has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.



Mr. T{tsu} is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.



Revolving doors were invented to keep Mr. T{tsu} from kicking them in all the time.



Mr. T{tsu}'s edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.



A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. A bird in the hand of Mr.T{tsu} is a deadly weapon in 17 states.



Mr. T{tsu}'s incredible greatness has been attributed to the fact that his genetic code doesn't have any A, G, or C. His genetic code is in fact, nothing but T's.



Every time Mr. T{tsu} pities the fool, a pornstar regains her virginity. Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.



Who let the dogs out? Mr. T{tsu} did, that's who. What the hell are you going to do about it?



Mr. T{tsu}'s hair style is actually a complex array of antennas that can triangulate the exact location of any fool in the universe. His gold chains can then transmit pity to those coordinates.



Mr. T{tsu} was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain.



There are now over 43 fools born every minute in order to keep up with the rate at which Mr. T{tsu} pities them.



Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T{tsu} is still able to pity him.



The last time Mr. T{tsu} went to McDonald's, Ronald McDonald greeted him. What occured next proved to be the most violent beating of a clown ever recorded in human history.



Before Mr. T{tsu}, the alphabet only had 25 letters.



Mr. T{tsu} is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.



Mr. T{tsu} made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.



Mr. T{tsu} doesn't have internal organs. He had them removed to make more room for muscle.



Originally the A-Team was named T-Team and consisted of Mr. T{tsu} and six of his genetically engineered clones driving around in a van made of pure gold. Producers changed the format after every criminal known to man was killed in the pilot episode.



Mr. T{tsu} took Mother Nature from behind. We refer to the event as the Big Bang.



When Mr. T{tsu} cuts onions, it's the onions doing the crying.



Mr. T{tsu} was originally cast to play Arnold Jackson on Diff'rent Strokes. Unfortunately every time he said, "whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" Willis **** himself.



If you were ever foolish enough to get into a fight with Mr. T{tsu}, there would only be two hits: Mr. T{tsu} hitting you, and you hitting the surface of the Sun.



Mr. T{tsu} doesn't obey the second law of thermodynamics. It obeys him.



Rome wasn't built in a day. But if Mr. T{tsu} had assisted, it sure as hell would've been.



During the filming of Rocky III, Burgess Meredith asked Mr. T{tsu} why he wore so much gold. To make a long story short, the script had to be changed to include Mickey's "accidental" death.